Well, i'm off then!

Thats right kiddies! It's all set!

The visa is being delivered to my house tomorrow, and then i'm flying the next day! Yeah thats right! Saturday lunchtime i'll be up in the air, flying the 4000 miles to my favourite job i've had so far. Everything is turning out ok, finally! It's taken me (since i finished camp in the summer last year) eight whole months! But, in two days time, it'll all be done. Phew...

So, seeing as how i'm going on my next adventure, i thought i might share some travel tips with you guys! (seeing as how i'm such an experienced traveller and such!)

So, here they are, under different catagorys!

Air travel

• Most important thing when you're traveling by air, for gods sake, dont mention guns, knifes or anything else terrorist related! My brother once bought a toy gun in spain...which he left in his carry-on luggage...
  
  Alarms sounded, men with guns surrounded us... fun for the whole family!
• I don't care what people say, there is no better seat than the isle seats! Sure, everyone loves a window seat. Only problem is you gotta climb over everyone to get to the toilet! And while we're on that subject, dont get those seats with "extra leg room" near the emergency exits. Thats where everyone stands to queue for the toilets!
• Oh and lastly, food. If you're gonna order a vegetarian meal, be prepared to be fed everything healthy under the sun! Wereas the meat-eaters will get white bread, decent butter and a chocolate cake for desert, you will get a wholemeal bun, some kind of "i can't believe there's no taste" margerine, and an apple for dessert. Y'know why? 'Cause everyone knows that people who are vegetarians are health mad freaks!

Train travel

• First things first! NEVER FALL ASLEEP! Not only can you miss your stop, but you'll probably wake up robbed.... and naked...
• If you're riding some kind of subway, such as the london underground, DONT MAKE EYE CONTACT! When people get on underground trains, things can get... unnervingly close especially during rush hours. Just don't look anyone in the eye, and keep an eye on valuables!
• Know where you're going! When you're travelling through a forigen country, names can sound very similar. What starts out as a simple trip across paris can turn into a horrible mess of different coloured lines, odd accents (even on letters!) and seemingly only paying 50p each... :S

Walking places

• If you gotta walk somewhere, use a damned map! You can never depend on locals (although most "locals" in big cities are infact, tourists!). If worst comes to worst, you know that the sun rises in the east and sets in the west... right?
• Blend in! Who's the street robber gonna mug? The guy ambling down the street confidently, or the guy in a hawaian shirt and shorts combo, who has a camera around his neck and a badly unfolded map in his hands? Think about what you're doing. Someone once said, "failing to plan, is planning to fail!"

General tips

• Wear a hat when travelling! That way it dosen't matter how your hair looks after an eight hour flight, during which you tried to sleep, but only ended up turning all night. And not just any kind of hat either, it's gotta be a beanie hat! They're soft, so they wont leave any kind of ring on your forehead which can cause spots the next day!
• It sounds lame, but put some money in your sock. No-one ever checks the socks! And while we're on the subject of money, if you're traveling abroad, leave a sensible ammount in sterling in your wallet. That way you're not likely to spend it unless you really need to.
• If you gotta pee, most train stations will charge you (hence the phrase, spend a penny!), but what they dont think of is that there is most likely (in the big ones at least) some kind of fast food outlet that'll let you use theirs, without even buying anything. (not like those damned pubs!)
• If you arranged to meet someone at a certain time, but you don't have your watch, and say, your phone died, then just walk alongside someone with a watch on, and subtley check the time! (digital is easier).
• Mainly, just keep your cool, no matter what happens. Think about it logically, and avoid talking to strangers!

I think thats enough for now, dont you?

Keep it safe kiddies!

Jamie
Veg
Banana